Bringing Your Heart and Wisdom to Feelings of Inadequacy, Episode 131

Awareness that heals episode 131.

A very warm welcome to season three of awareness that heals where we have progressed to be able to focus on one challenging emotion at a time. This will allow you to choose a specific emotion that you’ve had challenges with, and each one will have a progressive series of guided meditations that will allow you to go deeper and deeper into self-compassion. For me, it’s truly inspiring because each emotion has unique nuances for both self-care and responding to your environment at the same time. This is subtle and a rare skill as all too often we don’t stay aware of how we can care for ourselves as we are. I hope that you’ll not only find it helpful, but also give you deep resources that you can internalize when the emotion is most emerging. So let yourself notice how attentive you are to just being here, just listening to these words and having your awareness. Really be focused on the present moment and on this meditation

(01:33)
And guide yourself to inquire how can I join my awareness itself? And just focus on awareness and being awareness without attaching it to thoughts, to feelings, to the environment. And so close your eyes and just ask the question, what is it like? And really go in to experience it as much as possible just to be and see awareness itself, noticing itself. So you may say something like, I am awareness, being aware of awareness itself. Now, why is that important? Because when you see that you are awareness and it’s not dominated by anything, then you see that you are someone who can guide yourself from that awareness and what your patterns or habits or conditionings the way you’ve been taught, you are free to make your own rules. You are free to guide yourself in your life. You’re free to not taken over by criticism. So let yourself now use that awareness just to focus on times where you’ve felt inadequate or perhaps right now with your inadequacy feelings and see as you look, if you can just be hind and gentle toward the inadequacy feelings and notice how much you can recognize.

(03:34)
Of course, you want to care for yourself when you’re feeling inadequate. Of course you do. I mean, if I ask you a silly question, do you want to criticize yourself? Do you want to endlessly criticize yourself for being and feeling inadequate? Of course you don’t. Not when you’re really aware. So notice the miracle of feeling inadequate and wanting to care for yourself at the same time and being neutral or tolerant, accepting or welcoming, and increasing yourself in the direction of welcoming. And then allow yourself to ask the question to guide yourself further. How can I care for myself with my specific feelings of inadequacy? Now, of course, you need to notice what they are. It may be feelings of inadequacy because you don’t have the financial situation you want. You weren’t able to have children, and it’s something that you could never do anything about.

(04:41)
Or maybe it’s something you can do something about. Sometimes the feelings of inadequacy are going to result in just finding acceptance because it’s something that you can’t change, and sometimes you’re going to find it’s something that you can change, and then you go for it. And so you find that noticing your feelings of inadequacy gives you the guidance as to how you can be more adequate. And as I said just a moment ago, sometimes it’s just acceptance because you can’t do anything about it. So it’s first seeing can I do something about it or can’t I do something about it? And then as you ask these questions of how can I most care for it, you break it down even more simple. What thoughts are the ones that are going to benefit me and really guide me, not just platitudes or abstractions, but thoughts that are going to lead you to your next step.

(05:42)
They may be thoughts that are reminding you, stay present, stay in the next hour. Don’t get off in the future. What can I do with this feeling of inadequacy this moment or this hour or this day or this week? Then as you do that, you’re well on your way to guidance. Then you’re looking at the question, what needs or what essential qualities, what elements of compassion would help me with my feelings of inadequacy? So it might be a kindness, it might be a warmth, it might be a tenderness, it might be a courage, it might be humility. But you’re finding the qualities that you most need to embrace, your feelings of inadequacy, that empower you to keep exploring, how can I keep developing? And then you’re asking the final really profound question, which is, how do I bring my heart and my wisdom to this area where I feel inadequate?

(06:57)
What is my heart and my wisdom telling me? Now, if your heart is awake, it’s going to bring qualities like empathy and kindness and warmth and appreciation for you. Even in having the courage to go for this challenge, you may even feel excitement or inspiration because you’re doing something that very few of us ever do. And when you ask yourself, what wisdom do I need to have? Well, wisdom is always going to guide you to be present, to deal with the feelings of inadequacy in the near future or in the moment, but to not get way off in the future in an abstraction where you can’t do anything that’s going to be beneficial. So when you ask the question, what is my heart telling me? What is my wisdom telling me when I feel inadequate? Can you feel a warming up? Can you feel this mixture of the suffering, of feeling inadequate and the warmth and the golden glow of your heart and wisdom clearly wanting to support you in a very specific pragmatic and intuitive sort of way? So my hope is that you’ll carry this with you for whenever inadequacy arises, and then you’ll know instead of it being a curse, it’s a gift because you have these tools to work with. Thank you so much, and I wish this for you for the rest of your life. I wish this for me for the rest of my life as well. Thanks again so much.